Hello America: Unfuck Yourselves

Unfuck yourselves. Seriously. Please.

Self Care in the Age of Rage

What do you do to keep your shit together?

I have a deliberate set of things I do when my existential rage gets out of control. I start to feel my teeth get sore from clenching them and my heart rate soar, and I have a series of actions I have to set in motion so I don’t have a meltdown.

I scrub the fuck out of something. Clean the bathtub or the oven or something.

I color. I am a professional artist but I keep an adult coloring book on hand specifically for this. I bought my first one the day of the first debate between Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump. I was in line at Michael’s, saw it, and thought.... I think I need that. I thought I would find it boring because I “color” all day every day for work, why would I color in someone else’s illustration? But turns out, it’s INCREDIBLY therapeutic. I recommend you do it no matter how artistic you are or aren’t. I prefer colored pencils.

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I exfoliate, moisturize and massage my face. Most of the time this is calming down for the evening, but it is very indulgent and relaxing. I am not like...INTO beauty products. It’s not anything expensive - it’s just the act of doing it calms me.

I watch mindless soothing videos on Instagram. I really love watching those Buzzfeed Tasty recipe videos. A lot of times the recipes seem downright terrible but I love watching them. Also cake decorating videos. Other videos I watch are videos of wienerdogs swimming, videos of people mixing paint, and videos of people doing costume makeup (one of my favorite accounts).

Keep it together, Splinter refugees. You’ll need your strength.

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